he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
