You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
