they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
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