I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
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She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
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Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
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