My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Randomize
