she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
