im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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