Dual....:-)
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Randomize