worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon