She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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