I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
