lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize