:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
