just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
