so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
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