bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
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