Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Randomize
