i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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