NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
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