Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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