I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
