I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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