I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
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