The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
