Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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