I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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