remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
