I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.