new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Two words: blizzard sex
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Randomize
