discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize