I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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