Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
