Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
