she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
