shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
