gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
