Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
We are two peas in an std pod
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
