i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize
