Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize
