I wanna bring you to show and tell
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
The air taste purple.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
