She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
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