And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Just pee around me
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Randomize
