Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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