I need to stop coming to work sober
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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