I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
