Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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