You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
nutella sex= disaster
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
She swung at the pinata with crutches
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Randomize
