thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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