My entire life is one complicated drinking game
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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