I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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