she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
