my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
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