take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Randomize
